Most teams already know what’s broken.
They just need someone external to say it out loud. Or they’re so deep in the weeds they can’t see what’s actually slowing them down. If you’ve run 20 retros and nothing’s changed, it’s not because your team doesn’t care. Generally there are other patterns occuring that are invisible from inside the room.
What this is
A fast, objective diagnostic for software teams who want insight on whats causing friction.
You send your most recent retro notes (Google Doc, Miro board, Confluence page — whatever). I review them, identify the one delivery pattern quietly draining speed and focus, and give you a simple experiment to test next sprint.
What you get
1. One-page diagnostic — the pattern, the cause, and what it’s costing you.
2. Next-sprint experiment — one small change to test.
3. Optional 15-minute follow-up call — debrief results.
What this fixes
- Endless retros that feel good but change nothing
- Meetings about meetings
- “Communication problems” that are really decision latency
- Process theatre that looks agile but moves slow
You’ll leave with clarity you can act on tomorrow, not a manifesto to discuss for the next quarter.
Pilot price → NZ $495 + GST
Three spots per month while I finish refining the model.
If you find zero actionable value, you don’t pay.
(For context: reclaiming even one wasted hour per developer per week saves most teams 10× that amount.)
Why me?
20 years in software delivery, across startups and large teams. I’ve sat in hundreds of retros, stand-ups, and post-mortems. The patterns repeat. I call them out so you can stop repeating them.
Get a Snapshot
- No prep required; just send your last retro doc and any context you want to share.
- I’ll confirm within 24 hours and deliver the diagnostic within a week.
👉 Request Your Delivery Clarity Snapshot
(or email craig@thecynical.dev)